Change Just Enough So You Don’t Have to Change At All

After a series of talks between my ex-fiancee and myself, we’ve been able to come to some critical points of understanding of each other. There’s still a ways to go but should be from a distance a bit of a distance. We need to work out our issues and be ready to come back together properly or else we just fall back in to the same pattern and end up hitting the same brick walls.

Do people change, for many people it’s tough to break a pattern. The greatest and best way for people to change is by realizing it for themselves, though after years of finding that people really do as much as they need to do to stay the same. Only a few people decide to break the mould, learn and grow and make something of themselves, perhaps something more drastic is needed. Perhaps more of a rapid intervention, a reprogramming, like what Anthony Robbins does. But there’s a problem with that.

I remember my first fiancée’s (I’m on three and two diamond rings later) work colleague. They worked at one of the prestigious hair salons off Robson Street in downtown Vancouver. He, like everyone in their, we’re excellent hair stylists. Not being prejudice, my fiancée at the time was perhaps the best there. Anyways, this chap, for identity protection I can’t tell you his name, but let’s call him ‘The Trend’. Tend would cut people’s hair in such a way that it was like his signature. I don’t know how he managed to do it, but if you had short hair, long hair, curly hair or dreadlocks, you could always tell it was Trend who had cut it. When I used to walk down Robson Street, doing something like shopping or to pick up Rose, (I say pick up, it was here car I borrowed it and she needed to get home) I would occasionally see someone and think “I bet Trend” did that!

The same problem with not letting people experience or self-realising and encouraging reprogramming means they come out looking the same, the same signature. I could always tell who had come out of an Anthony Robbins course. Yes lots and lots of positive qualities they had, but many of them seemed to adopt Anthony’s Style, which to be honest, only really works for Anthony. And for him it works well! Adopted by others can be a bit annoying. Never having had the opportunity to take Anthony Robbin’s course (which I would live to, I would love to do all of them!), I can’t tell if it’s the training program which creates this quality or if it’s something that rubs off, my feeling is it’s the latter.

If I adopt this way of rapid intervention to help people accelerate their ‘progress’, then I will need to make sure that people can still be themselves and let their personality come through. The problem I’m sensing is that people strive towards what they want to become, and to do that, they need a picture, inspiration, idol to look up to do that. Movies and it’s impact has just taken on a whole new light.

Why do I say all this again? That’s it…because though I want to share and benefit others what I’ve learnt I don’t want people to become replica’s of Alan. Even I’m aware enough that the world only needs one of me. But a melting of minds. An upgrade to the better version and the person still has their own flavour of being themselves, with their own thoughts and ideas, fulfilling their purpose in life. To be understood and to understand, to learn from all we learn and use that to benefit others.

Anyways, last night. Well, it was good. She invited me over for dinner, I hadn’t eaten anything all day. I stayed over and you can guess the rest.

The Mindful ‘Happy Camper’